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Bloody Hell

I decided to push myself to the limit…

But sadly… my body was not prepared for the giant leap of being a sedentary individual to an active cardiovascular-monster person. Blood came out gushing from my nose on my 30 minute run last saturday. (I don’t know what happened… but it freaked me out that I was wasted for the whole day and was hesitant to workout last sunday)

My nose still hurts right now… but the hell…who cares.

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My niece had an operation to fix her heart problem. I was very thankful that she is safe and the energy to ask her mom for her pictures to be taken with her shoes and teddy bear.

One thing about me is that I hate hospitals for it is reeking with “clean” smell that makes you nauseated. I hate hospitals for it reminded me of my life when I was just in kindergarden, when my mom and I have frequent visits to Lungsod ng Kabataan to treat my inflammed lungs. In those days, I will have panic attacks at the sight of a retractable ballpen, thinking with my pristine mind, that it’s a syringe. Yes, I am already experiencing psychosis in those days.

But right after I went there…. I hate it for it mirrors the economic struggle most Pilipinos are undergoing.

There are some patients who died in the O.R. because of complications that have arisen from the delaying operation… the reason of the delay as my cousin tells me is that most of them were opting to have a free (or maybe less expensive) operation by applying for the charity ward. Currently… there are 800 approved charity operations, so even if you get the approval… you still have to wait. Operations for charity are done… sometimes as scarce as one patient a week… three the most. Getting operated also doesn’t mean a 100% chance of success, for you will be operated by interns guided by doctors who doesn’t care if a patient dies on the table for they all signed a waiver.

Cost of operation? Almost half a million. Not even on private room, mind you.

Another patient has a disease called “Kawasaki“. They haven’t left the hospital for a few months now. Not because the doctors can’t treat him, but because they don’t have enough money to pay their hospital bills.

The cost of each treatment… 40K. Enough downpayment for a kawasaki motorcycle.

Sadly, I can do nothing for those poor kids. But sometimes… I’m thinking if thanking God for not making you sick like them is as bad as laughing at someone’s misfortunes.

 

Of Political Ads

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Before we went on with my rantings for this day. Let me just say that I am blaming valentine’s day for making the MRT crowded, sidewalks beaming with nuisance roses/gifts and ofcourse lovers flooding malls.

I even saw my neighbor, whom I don’t know personally, making out with her boyfriend on the street on my way out….

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I missed two days without going to the gym. No, I didn’t lose my drive to finally become thin… my hormones love valentine’s day so much, so it went valentine’s on valentine’s day. Good guess….

I am telling you this because not going to the gym simply means that I can watch television again (Prison break, commercials and current events)… which is somewhat entertaining if not shitty because my boardmates are eating chocolates while watching so I feel so…. Pathetic.

Current Events Side:

Kids are so much different these days. Imagine, they do pickets in front of the school to get their principal ousted. I don’t know if I will applaud them for their courage or kick them in the rear for having shit for a brain.

Reminds me of my own immaturity way back in high school, I planned a boycott (all of us should be absent that Friday) and got the whole class to participate. That plan… was ruined by a faggot snitch that turned us out to a faculty member. So trigonometry that day was converted into values education. Our teacher discussed the responsibility of being a student and how we can change the world without being radical.

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V for Vengeance

V for Vengeance

 

Yes, I’ve watched it. It’s a nice movie to watch especially our country is slowly crashing down due to political turmoil. It’s Dekada 60 written by the Wachowski Brother. As the movie imply…. “The people should not fear its government…. The government should fear its people”

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Watching this movie will enlightened, or maybe change your opinion about those rascals and martyrs who are willing to die to fight for human rights and other shitnitz. Why are they willing to die for something that they cannot touch and will not bring direct benefits (like sex food). Maybe after watching this movie, traffic caused by rallies will not bother you anymore… for the reason behind their acts will be clear to you… they are willing to sacrifice even their lives for they are not afraid to die for their principles rather than live in the shadow of someone they are not.

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So, Are you afraid?

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Afraid of losing your love one for you don’t know how to live your life without them…

Afraid of waking up alone every morning…

Afraid of facing your problems for you are afraid that it might more complicated than what you have expected….

Afraid to know what’s really happening and participate in fighting for your principles for you are afraid to lose everything…

Afraid to get hurt…

Afraid to let go…

Afraid of responsibility…

Afraid of being rejected…

Afraid to be happy…

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Fear hinders yourself from discovering what you really are

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BTW, Ghost scares the shit out of me…

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