Arguments

I hate arguments, it’s a waste of energy, time and intellectual juice and nobody wins. That is why I like to explain my side when my feeling of anger has subsided for I think I can express my feelings as well as listen to the other people’s side of the story.

Most arguments I’ve encountered happens in a public utility vehicles between passengers and drivers. Whether it’s the inability of the driver to stop immediately when the passenger says “Para” or the temporary amnesia the driver suffers when giving change, it will end up in heated argument.

I are the Happies

Last Monday, after watching how fucked up Maricris of PBB turns out to be, (I do watch PBB for psychological reasons) I decided tone down my anger. My last blog can attest to that, no curse words, no hatred, wholesome. That day however, turns out to be a Denver vs. Spurs Game, with a sweet beginning and wretched ending.

I greeted everyone with a smile. Compliment my friends. Work my ass out. And then:

Events were cancelled. Unsolicited remarks poured. The task that I need to do is filing up to my neck and the pc constantly freezing is not a great help. As an icing to my bad day cake, I figured that this douche bag was responsible for the creative shits I have been mulling about the last two months. The fact that I stepped on all those crap thinking that I deserve it, fueled my anger.

The Sudden Gush of Temper

We all have stupid/weird reactions to certain situations. In my case, I don’t like any disruptions when engaged in a mind boggling activity called “watching my favorite movie/show”. My initial reaction when someone irritates me during those times is being bitchy (I’ll give you 10% of my attention but will eventually say or do things that will certainly piss you off) or worse… I’ll definitely slap you to stop disturbing me. There are few people who have experience my uncontrollable violence and … I’m sorry.

My rationalization for this behavior is that I’ve spent my entire 16 years alone. Well, not actually alone-in-a-deserted-island kinda way but I prefer the company of dust mites in my room than going out with friends. See, while most teenagers beg their parents for approval to go partying, it was my mom who begs my barkada (those who unfortunately run into her on streets) to visit me at our house and ask me to go out ANYWHERE. Maybe my mom thinks I’m a leper who is incapable of calling my friends using our landline, but if anyone bites into my mom’s pleading, rest assured I will offer them free merienda and just watch fight club or some gruesome movie for me to avoid the heat of the sun.

I hate you

My psychotic tendency has not been waning as I thought it would after a month. Instead, I am as fucked up as I could be. I still feel blue for no particular reason.

There’s also this strong urge to kick the butt of people who mirrors my retarded views and autistic disposition in life. It seems, whether they did it intentionally or not, that my mistakes are being rubbed in my face. That I am a fucktard. That I should change. That everyone deserves to hate me because I emanate hate myself. That I will never be understood for my character is way beyond the limits of understandable.

So, being a paranoid beyotch is not the greatest thing in the world. Everyone seems to hate you and everything you do seems to be an act of a sociopath. To rationalize everything… these are the things that I think contributes to my insanity:

Bloody Hell

I decided to push myself to the limit…

But sadly… my body was not prepared for the giant leap of being a sedentary individual to an active cardiovascular-monster person. Blood came out gushing from my nose on my 30 minute run last saturday. (I don’t know what happened… but it freaked me out that I was wasted for the whole day and was hesitant to workout last sunday)

My nose still hurts right now… but the hell…who cares.

=========================================

My niece had an operation to fix her heart problem. I was very thankful that she is safe and the energy to ask her mom for her pictures to be taken with her shoes and teddy bear.

One thing about me is that I hate hospitals for it is reeking with “clean” smell that makes you nauseated. I hate hospitals for it reminded me of my life when I was just in kindergarden, when my mom and I have frequent visits to Lungsod ng Kabataan to treat my inflammed lungs. In those days, I will have panic attacks at the sight of a retractable ballpen, thinking with my pristine mind, that it’s a syringe. Yes, I am already experiencing psychosis in those days.

But right after I went there…. I hate it for it mirrors the economic struggle most Pilipinos are undergoing.

There are some patients who died in the O.R. because of complications that have arisen from the delaying operation… the reason of the delay as my cousin tells me is that most of them were opting to have a free (or maybe less expensive) operation by applying for the charity ward. Currently… there are 800 approved charity operations, so even if you get the approval… you still have to wait. Operations for charity are done… sometimes as scarce as one patient a week… three the most. Getting operated also doesn’t mean a 100% chance of success, for you will be operated by interns guided by doctors who doesn’t care if a patient dies on the table for they all signed a waiver.

Cost of operation? Almost half a million. Not even on private room, mind you.

Another patient has a disease called “Kawasaki“. They haven’t left the hospital for a few months now. Not because the doctors can’t treat him, but because they don’t have enough money to pay their hospital bills.

The cost of each treatment… 40K. Enough downpayment for a kawasaki motorcycle.

Sadly, I can do nothing for those poor kids. But sometimes… I’m thinking if thanking God for not making you sick like them is as bad as laughing at someone’s misfortunes.

 

Stranded

I have a couple of times been stranded. Remember the time when the monsoon rains were rampant and the zagoo stands are all over the metro. The goddamn traffic was so bad at that time, I walked my way from Pasig Rotonda to Sta. Mesa. The good thing about that incident is my parents bought me a cellphone (5110 was the hottest at that time) and made me an instant “call center” (patawag naman sa phone mo!). Or maybe not. So fuck with that…

Another important ability aside from tolerance is the ability to climb like spiderman. It comes handy when your only option to survive is climbing a twelve feet truck or swimming in the flood, avoiding the garbage and probably human shit that you will encounter along the way.

But for the life of me, I have never been stranded because I have no money. Okay.. I have evaded a jeepney driver once on purpose because I’d rather do that than to be humiliated by paying a 1000 bill for a 5 peso fare.

So I loathe those people who will just approach you and ask for fare money. My encounter with these seemingly stupid people leaving their houses without extra moolah is somewhat frequenting. Yeah, I think this is the new hoax. And its irritating. Just last night… someone approached me again asking for a fare… I dunno… maybe the fact that I look nice (ehem) or an easy prey (fucktards!) attracts those losers.

These are the top three incidents with these stranded people

TOP 3: Rescue me my long lost grandchild
Strategy: A smile… a simple smile and smiling back means you’re a target…

Mama: Ako’y manghihingi lang ng konting tulong sa inyo, medyo kinapos kasi ako ng perang pamasahe. Baka may barya kayo jan?

Findings : Judging by Lolo’s japorms… he may have no enough money for a jeepney fare. Also the fact that there’s a pack of cigarette (Marlboro) in his pocket makes me think that he bought that with his fare money.

TOP 2: Rescue me I just been robbed! …. in my dreams!
Strategy: This is a girl maneuver. Maybe because, girls are more charming when in distress which make perverts an easy target. Or the fact that only girls brings fancy bags that can easily be ripped… Slowly, the will approached you and like a ninja slashing someone’s head will immediately talk non-stop:

Victim: Grabe nalaslasan ako. Grabe, Miss baka naman pwedeng makahingi kahit konting barya lang. Grabe, pang-uwi ko lang kasi wala na talaga akong pera. Grabe.

Findings: Grabe. Grabe talaga. But if ever I am in her situation I would also panic… especially if I am claiming to have my valuables lost to a robber who slashed my bag and my bag let see… yeah has no signed of being slashed… I will need money to go to. Mental. Hospital.

TOP 1: Rescue me… I am so rich!!!!!…I don’t need have any valuables!
Strategy: Speaks taglish… those coñotic version ala clueless kinda thing. But mind you he looks like an orc… literally.

RICHKID: Miss is this the only Megamall here. Hey don’t worry, I don’t mean any harm so don’t be scared okay.
Me: Oo…
RICHKID : The Mega A and the Mega B?
Me: Oo (Cool… just when your stomach is grumbling, a retard will come in your way)
RICHKID : I’m suppose to be waiting for my brother kasi, and he’s suppose to be here at 2 o clock in the afternun (Look… it’s 8 p.m. your brother who may also be an orc … might be also as lost as you are…)
Ako: (Approaching boiling point due to hunger) baka nasa unahan
RICHKID : I’ve already been there eh, actually nalibot ko na siya.
Ako: (Oh.. my .. God… I know where exactly this is heading to…)
RICHKID : I really need some help, Can you lend me some money, I’ll pay it tommorow right here (Yeah Right!) I’m a balikbayan kasi and I’ve just been here a week ago, I live in Laguna Bel-Air…. Mga 80 to 100 pesos lang (Nice… there’s a price range… mind if I make tawad????)
Ako: WALLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
RICHKID :Okay, anyway… thank you… (at least he has manners)

Findings : No rich individual will be stranded. Trust me.

So, if you ever find yourself stranded… and you need to ask for money. Please… for the love of God, copy the aforementioned incident

Elevator Dramathon

Riding the MRT never fails to give something to laugh about. This morning…

Elevator:
Scene: We are being squished inside the elevator and the has been opening for three times because of people who still wants to get inside…

Aleng Humahabol: Kasya pa ba ako…
Manong Mainit ang Ulo: Hindi na!!!! (Taray ng lolo mo)
Aleng Humahabol: (Pumasok pa rin)
Elevator: BIIIIIIIIPPPPPPPPP (bumukas ulit ang pinto)
Manong Mainit ang Ulo: Ano ba puno na bakit ba bumubukas pa! (aatakihin na sa puso sa galit)
Aleng Mainit ang ulo na nasa labas ng elevator: Over Loaded na kayo kaya ayaw sumara (Bilisan niyo!!!)
Aleng Humahabol: (Lumabas)
Elevator: (Bumukas pa rin)
Manong Mainit ang Ulo: Bakit niyo ba pinipindot puno na nga!!!!

Nice… I find it funny that they choose to waste their energy shouting and frowning at each other instead of walking…retards…